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Saturday, July 23, 2016

What I Wish I'd known about being a MAMA

Today I wanted to begin this post by sharing 8 things that I wish I'd known before being a bona fide mama. I truly was not that girl that envisioned myself surrounded by little humans that were all mine. Honestly, when I was younger I was busy daydreaming about being in movies, and traveling the world. I had babysat on two separate occasions, never held a newborn until my very own child was placed in my arms, so yeah I went into motherhood pretty clueless to say the least. I had silly expectations from hearing mothers talk about raising their children, watching my own parents, and friends parents. But I can tell you right when I think I have something figured out these kids throw me through a loop. 

So pre kids Amber, here's what I wish you'd known...

1) Having children will make you more compassionate for all living things: Having a sweet little toddler constantly pointing out all the living creatures around you just makes you more aware of life in all it's forms. Anywhere we go now I can't help but notice the butterfly, snail, chipmunk, baby ducks that pass us. 


2) Remember that parent you judged?  You will be "that parent:" I can't lie and say that I didn't see some parents doing something in public and thinking, oh I'll never do that, or I'll never allow my child to do that.... well I have and I will hahaha. You never know exactly what someone is going through that day, their child, their circumstances, their mental health, or lack of sleep. I have just learned that being a parent is hard and we all just need a good ole fist pump action when we see each other in the trenches battling it out. 

3) Get used to being tired: Love a newborn baby, their sweetness, their essence but can I just say that the sleep deprivation that comes with said newborn is the worst thing in the world! Seriously it's the main thing I fear about having another child. So I'd tell myself just get used to the fact you'll always be on some level of tired. 

4) Consistency and a schedule is everything: Having routines which guide your life will make parenting so much easier, especially those long days where the hubby is gone. But consistency reallllly matters with discipline.  Get your warning system and your go-to consequences figured out and stick to them. Also, when you say, "1.... 2..... " you better say, "3!" without delay, and follow through with the next EXPECTED step immediately.  Otherwise, your kids will be in complete control. And just remember that kids honestly do need discipline.

5) You will alternate having bad feelings toward your children and loving them so much it hurts: It's crazy how fast you can go from wanting to pull your hair out, to wanting to cuddle and kiss the crap out of your child. I have had moments where I am literally crazy obsessed heart eyes in love with my child, and right after wanting to run out of the house to escape and get away so I don't SNAP at said child. Just get used to the emotional rollarcoaster because your dealing with little humans that don't know how to navigate their own yet. 

6) You will probably stop listening to music in the car: Listening to music while driving was a must for me, but now I much prefer the crazy conversations and yelling matches I have with my toddler and baby. 

7) You will never really get to just sit down and do your own thing anymore: The days of sitting to read your book, or watch your movie are over my friend... at least until your kids get a little older. 

8) Love is the answer: If everything you do or say is motivated by your love, you are doing everything just the way you need to!